everyone here's in trouble

i can't roll my r's. i can't curl my tongue. i can't snap my fingers with the fingers on my left hand. i can't whistle. i can't swallow pills easily. i can't crack my knuckles. i can't bench more than 70 pounds. i can't chug anything. i can't pass chocolate by. i can't listen to country.. i can't play the piano. i can't stand the sound of nails on a chalkboard. i can't even say "nails on a chalkboard". i can't watch horror movies. i can't drink dr. pepper or root beer. i can't fall asleep later than twelve am. i can't wake up after more than six hours of sleep. i can't wear anything in the ordinary. i can't take a generic compliment from a platonic person. i can't wear yellow. i can't make up my mind.

can? what's that mean?

-d