the icicle lights above my window cast a soft glow into my otherwise darkened room

there's an image i wish i could get out of my head.

it's weird; lately all of my dreams come to me after i've woken up once in the morning and gone back to sleep, those little twelve minute snippets of supposed ecstacy. but all i see are familiar faces, faces i want to forget. faces i told myself i wouldn't dredge up again unless they appeared right before my eyes. how silly of me;
just when i thought i was chasing naïevity away, she's been walking beside me the whole time.

i hear sirens so much more since the snow fell. it fell in (buckets?), like the angels ripped open thousands of down pillows and poured them over us. cars have been slipping and sliding, mine included. i hate sirens.
i didn't hear the ones that came for you, but for some reason it reminds me all the same.

i'm poor. it's cold. i'm so unsure of my future, and to top it, the following lyrics have put me in a state of subdued melancholy.
christmas please be merry.

it was so like you to visit me
to let me know you were okay
it was so like you to visit me
you always worried about someone else

in your life you were larger than this
statue. statuesque.

so upset. so upset.

-d