sometimes i talk to you like you're me

I told you.
You may not have noticed, but I told you.

It was unscripted, but I felt it moving up from my center to my chest to my throat the longer I sat with you and listened to you repeat yourself, saying you were walking dead and needed rest. I figured when I walked, unfamiliar, backstage after the show and it was already 12:30, that I'd overdressed.

Apparently people thought we were dating. I didn't see your reaction when we were told we looked like we should be dating because I turned because I was turning red.

But we waited outside in the biting cold for two separate rides and I made a National pun to irk you. We hugged and kissed goodbye and as my ride pulled up I don't remember what I said before, but I said the thing.

I like you.
I walked to the car.
Self-deprecating, "No one likes meee."
Opening the car door, turning around, "Well I like you."
Car door closed, wave goodbye.

And just in case you hadn't gotten the gist, I texted you when I got home.
It might have been too much. I might have accused you of being too talented. And called you cute. And I like you.

If you still want to hang out this week, it will mean you either picked up on it, or you didn't.
If you don't want to hang out this week, it will mean you either picked up on it, or you didn't and are just tired.

Either way, I feel lifted and freed.

If no, then we end it and return as newer, better friends. It is what it is.
If yes, then we...go from there.

I'd be lying if I said I don't care either way, because I do, but I think because I've served it to you and it's your turn, I am free to focus on the rest of my life and make shit happen. It's that moment between the end of my volley and the swing of your own racket.

It's on your side of the court.
Either way, don't miss it.