can we

please get out of here? forget all.

i wish we could take a hold of clouds. i think they'd feel like cotton if we could; and we could shape them and put them back on the blue of the sky. we could make a story; a fairy-tale; "and that kids, is why clouds look certain shapes" is because of you and i.

... .......................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

spin me, twirl me. cover my eyes and ask me who's there; but when i open them and turn around, you're sneaking up behind someone else. i go and hide, and you never find me. but i'm in my favorite hiding place, in the little niche in the hallway where no one ever looks down; no one's ever found me cause i end up waiting until the late hours.

i feel like crying, but indians never cry. that's from a book i started reading but stopped because it was too mature for me then. i went looking for it in my mom's bookshelves the other day and couldn't find it, or did i not just recognize it?

i didn't recognize the dark circles in my eyes the other day in the mirror. i'm sure they've been there, but i opened my eyes for the first time since the middle of august and shocked myself nearly out of my skin.

if i took the sun and ate it, if i took the moon and made it my halo, would you still ignore the radiance and focus on the darkened sky?

starestarestarestaaarrrrre. i need to stop staring. stop taking the other hands in yours. stop the camera, hold the phone. stop the world turning. if the world stops, i could walk around it once and sneak up behind you and put my hands over your eyes and try to get you to guess who it was. if you bothered to turn away from her and look, i might be there.

i might be gone away.

we'll wait and see.

-d